ARAPROSDOKIANS are figures of speech in
which the latter part of a sentence is unexpected. Winston
Churchill loved 'em; hope you do, as well. A representative sample of
araprosdokians follows:
1.
Where there's a will, I want to be in it.
2.
Since light travels faster than sound, some people appear bright until you hear
them speak.
3. If I agreed with you, we'd both
be wrong.
4. War does not determine who is
right - only who is left.
5
Knowledge is knowing a tomato is a fruit. Wisdom is not
putting it in a fruit salad.
6.
They begin the evening news with 'Good Evening,' then proceed to tell you why
it isn't.
7. To steal ideas from someone is
plagiarism. To steal from many is called research.
8.
In filling in an application, where it says, 'In case of emergency,
notify:' I put 'DOCTOR.'
9. I didn't say it was your fault,
I said I was blaming you.
10. Women will never be equal to men
until they can walk down the street with a bald head and a
beer gut, and still think they look sexy.
11. Behind every
successful man is his woman. Behind the fall of a successful man is
usually
another woman.
12. A clear conscience
is the sign of a bad memory.
13. I
used to be indecisive. Now I'm not so sure.
14.
Nostalgia isn't what it used to be. Nor is there any future in it.
15. Change is inevitable, except from
a vending machine.
16. Going to church doesn't make you a
Christian any more than standing in your garage makes you a car.
17. I'm supposed to respect my elders, but
it’s getting harder and harder for me to find one now.
18. I am not arguing with you, I am
explaining why you are wrong.
suu tam
PQT
Canada
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